Sep 27, 2010

don't think of me morbid

Death.  It crosses my mind everyday.  Jesus's death, my grandparents' death, my friend's parent's death, my own parent's death, my friend's death, my sisters death, my death.
At any second, i could take my life, or God could take my life, or even scarier... At any second, any one of the people i so desperately love could take their like, or God could take their life, or even scarier...
As i right this, i feel as if i am staring death in the face and describing it to you. I don't want to die. I don't want my family or friends to die. not today.
But i am a curious daughter... what would the world be like with one less person in it.  What songs would be sung at my funeral when my time comes. What words would i say at the funerals that are to come?
Would my life even be complete? Would i say i have done everything i wished? Would it be a punishment from God, or a simple next step that he thinks I am ready to take?
Death.
It crosses my mind daily. Some days i decide i am not scared of it. Today i decide that i am terrified of it's darkness, and what it can compel people to do or think.
At the end of the day, i will still thank God for the day he has let me live, and in the morning i will still thank God for the day he has allowed me to see. And hopefully i will never lose that thanks.


All the souls who have passed RIP 
What would you think of me now,
so lucky, so strong, so proud?
I never said thank you for that,
now I'll never have a chance.
May angels lead you in.
Hear you me my friends.
On sleepless roads the sleepless go.
May angels lead you in.

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